How god makes women

[twinegarden]

My friend and I were waxing philosophic about how god makes women and here is what we came up with:

Every day, God has an allotment of points that he has to create women. He has many difficult decisions on how to make these women. Here are the most important criteria God has while making these decisions. They are split up into three major categories, which are body, face and personality.

God has no real preference on where he emphasizes the distribution of his points for each women amongst these three categories but he does try to mix them up pretty well so we have a nice rounded out population of women on this here Earth. As we all know, God is not alway fair and doesn't always give all women an equal number of points to start with, and so is the way of the world.

God has a few sub-categories to the three main categories the subcategories are as follows:

Face-
-nose
-eyes
-mouth
-roundness of head
-hair (facial and on top)

Body-
-legs
-ass
-tits
-stomach
-back fat

Personality
-intellegence
-humor
-sexual appetite
-spirituality
-ambition

God has strange ways of divying up these points and has only a limited number of points to spend daily. For the most part god works on a bell curve when spreading out these points, here is a bell curve to illustrate:




There you have it, one of life's great questions answered.

[ignatiusreilly]

This sounds like a lot of bong rips and a sheet of notebook paper. Good thing you guys had the paper, or you'd have forgotten about your profound discovery a few hours later. But instead you got to share it with the world. Way to go.

[bucketochicken]

haha, "back fat."

[skillz]

Look, my first posting says fuck.

[Dr. Doofenshmirtz (Heywood)]

Sept 19, 2008 12:19:25 GMT -6 skillz said:

Look, my first posting says f**k.

For that, you have been exalted.

[Gumbyhawk]

Sept 19, 2008 11:28:52 GMT -6 @twinegarden said:

My friend and I were waxing philosophic about how god makes women and here is what we came up with:

Every day, God has an allotment of points that he has to create women. He has many difficult decisions on how to make these women. Here are the most important criteria God has while making these decisions. They are split up into three major categories, which are body, face and personality.

God has no real preference on where he emphasizes the distribution of his points for each women amongst these three categories but he does try to mix them up pretty well so we have a nice rounded out population of women on this here Earth. As we all know, God is not alway fair and doesn't always give all women an equal number of points to start with, and so is the way of the world.

God has a few sub-categories to the three main categories the subcategories are as follows:

Face-
-nose
-eyes
-mouth
-roundness of head
-hair (facial and on top)

Body-
-legs
-ass
-tits
-stomach
-back fat

Personality
-intellegence
-humor
-sexual appetite
-spirituality
-ambition

God has strange ways of divying up these points and has only a limited number of points to spend daily. For the most part god works on a bell curve when spreading out these points, here is a bell curve to illustrate:




There you have it, one of life's great questions answered.

Puff, puff, pass...

[roxxstar]

And have you ever stopped and thought, wow, trees man. Trees grow and shit. I mean....wow man. LOL

Twine, let me hit that shit.

[Saggitariutt Jefferspin (ith)]

The only reason we die...is because we accept it...as an inevitability...WOA!

[twinegarden]

You guys are all dismissing the genius of my post with all this weed talk.

One of the big subtleties of this philosophy is that sometimes when God makes women he uses most of the points on body and face, ignoring personality. He can sometimes also use all of the points on personality, completely ignoring body and face. Every once in a while god nails it and spends a ton of that days points making the perfect woman. Unfortunately, some poor wench out there has to be the opposite piece of trash that was nearly ignored in all other categories (maybe one point for each attribute).

As you look around the world this weekend, I think you will find my findings to be quite true.

I could have written a damn good paper on the subject in my philosophy or religion classes in college.

[roxxstar]

I would have to disagree that God creates women, as I don't believe in "God" (at least not as a person sitting around deciding how hot to make certain women). So, you lost me as soon as "God" was involved.

[mattahawk]

I don't care how God makes women, I am just thankful that he does. (the hot ones anyway)