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Post by germaine on Nov 7, 2008 13:27:51 GMT -6
I'm single, as you know. A new bar opened up in town (Wednesday, in fact) and it's a few blocks away from home. I'm considering walking over there tonight for a bit, maybe have a drink or two, see if I can meet new people. By myself. I don't really have a problem going to a restaurant alone (though I don't really do that unless I'm traveling...I generally view eating out as a waste of money). I'm often uncomfortable approaching people in public and starting up a conversation. And I'd feel like a loser if I just sat in the bar alone (or played darts or pool alone...especially if I did that alone). I guess I think that people wouldn't want to talk to me, so they won't approach me, or they wouldn't want me to go over and start a conversation with them. I feel like I should go...but it's scary.  I also feel like I'm way too old for this insecurity crap.  |
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Post by NOTTHOR on Nov 7, 2008 13:33:04 GMT -6
Just give it a shot. I'll tell you a little secret about dudes, a lot of them are as scared to talk to you as you are to talk to them, so drink a few drinks before you go (saves some $$$), get a good buzz (liquid courage, as they call it) and go talk to some dudes.
Bince you like to tailgate and stuff, you've got a significant advantage over other gals, remember that. I expect some mougar stories tomorrow!!!
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Post by germaine on Nov 7, 2008 13:57:24 GMT -6
Mougar! Ha!
I'm wearing my Nile Kinnick throwback jersey today (as I do every Friday during football season). Do you suppose it would be a hindrance or no?
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Post by NOTTHOR on Nov 7, 2008 14:04:23 GMT -6
Where do you live? If you live in Lames, it could be a hindrance, but if you live anywhere with smart fellas, it will be a conversation starter.
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Post by mattahawk on Nov 7, 2008 14:05:25 GMT -6
Mougar! Ha! I'm wearing my Nile Kinnick throwback jersey today (as I do every Friday during football season). Do you suppose it would be a hindrance or no? Not if you live in Iowa germaine. In fact it would probably be a good conversation piece with the guys. I would definitely go out. Why the hell not? What have you got to be insecure about? If you are alone that just means you will have more opportunities to talk to guys without another girlfriend getting in the way. Guys, such as me, always hated going up to a girl if she was with a friend whether I was alone or with my buddies. You go out alone and I guarantee you, unless you hide in a corner, you will be talking to the guys in no time. If you know how to play pool adequately put your quarters up. Especially if they are already playing doubles. Then you can say you don't have a partner. That's when you look around for a single guy and say hey, I need a partner, you interested? Boom, your in. |
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Post by Saggitariutt Jefferspin (ith) on Nov 7, 2008 14:05:48 GMT -6
Mougar! Ha! I'm wearing my Nile Kinnick throwback jersey today (as I do every Friday during football season). Do you suppose it would be a hindrance or no? I love a woman in a jersey. In fact I'm getting my wife an Urlacher jersey for Christmas. Any lady that knows about sports just adds a +1 in the coolness column. And BTR is right...most guys are twice as scared to try and start a conversation with a pretty lady. In fact, when I met my wife for the first time, she was actually the one to initiate conversation. |
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Post by NotMyKid on Nov 7, 2008 14:18:52 GMT -6
That's a tough one. But what do you have to lose? Sit at the bar and shoot the shit with the Bartender and see how things go after a few beers if nobody peaks your interest or the bartenders an asshole just head home and call it a night. The bar (not the building but the actual bar) is the best place to be more traffic and more of a chance to strike up a conversation with someone without it being awkward while they are waiting for a beer. More options that way or just tell the Bartender that you are lose and horny and things will take care of themselves. jk  |
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Post by Solar Stud on Nov 7, 2008 14:55:20 GMT -6
If BTR would happen to show up, run!
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Post by socal on Nov 7, 2008 15:06:17 GMT -6
Just make eye contact & you will have set out all the bait you need.
.....That, or take your top off & start dancing on a table.
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Post by ignatiusreilly on Nov 7, 2008 15:10:34 GMT -6
If BTR would happen to show up, run! Yeah ditto that. Just go, Germaine. Is there anyone you can go with that is also single and would go? If not that's cool, just do what BTR said and drink a bottle or two of wine or have 4 or 5 beers before you go. Dress as close to slutty as possible without going over, and look for the guy that doesn't look like a womanizer. I can spot em, so it is possible. You'll be fine. I can't say I'm good at going out alone. I usually avoid it, but I'm a shy sap. What town do you live in? I'm sure there's people on here who would go out with you. |
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Post by 101 on Nov 7, 2008 15:23:34 GMT -6
Germaine....you live in NL right? If so, the Hawkeye Jersey will definitely give you some points. Guys like girls that not only enjoy sports but also have a few licks of knowledge as well.
Walk in there like you own the place, just be your own friendly self and talk to anyone you want to without any expectation of getting a date out of it. If you change your motives for talking with guys, then it will take some of the pressure off and you can just have fun.
As you know, once the conversation starts, all of the rest comes on it's own.
I didn't detect any insecurity when you stopped by the tailgate so I think you're a confident woman. BTW...feel free to stop by again tomorrow, or for that matter, anytime. We're always there in the same spot.
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Post by MoHawk on Nov 7, 2008 16:52:34 GMT -6
Go. Absolutely. The reasons to go far outweigh those to not go. For the first time in recorded history...some wise advice from BTR. Have a drink or two before you head out to loosen yourself up a little bit, just get those natural inhibitions out of the way.
Expo's advice is also spot on. Hang out at the bar, much better chances of interaction than just sitting at a table, where your primary interaction will be with the waitress.
Good huntin' germaine. Can't wait to hear the stories!
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Post by hawkeyedug on Nov 7, 2008 17:00:55 GMT -6
What is this new bar? Hell, I live in NL maybe the GF and I can come out.
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Post by germaine on Nov 7, 2008 17:19:55 GMT -6
I do live in NL. And no, I don't have any single friends. They're all paired off, which can leave me feeling a tad lonely. Not that I think I need someone to be happy (I've been single for 99% of my adult life). But couples rarely want to separate, it seems.
I can hide my insecurity fairly well...survival and whatnot.
Dug...the new place is Roadie's on the NE corner of Penn and 965, in that new strip mall.
My shirt will definitely not be coming off!!
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Post by Saggitariutt Jefferspin (ith) on Nov 7, 2008 17:28:49 GMT -6
Maybe you could talk them into a girls night out. That's what us guys do so we can actually have a guys night out.
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Post by 101 on Nov 7, 2008 19:23:08 GMT -6
Germaine....you remember Matty at the tailgate don't you? As you might recall from his performance, a couple of drinks certainly did help him get rid of those "natural inhibitions". Probably a good idea. Go. Absolutely. The reasons to go far outweigh those to not go. For the first time in recorded history...some wise advice from BTR. Have a drink or two before you head out to loosen yourself up a little bit, just get those natural inhibitions out of the way. Expo's advice is also spot on. Hang out at the bar, much better chances of interaction than just sitting at a table, where your primary interaction will be with the waitress. Good huntin' germaine. Can't wait to hear the stories! |
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Post by germaine on Nov 7, 2008 20:13:48 GMT -6
So I get there, there are a couple seats open at the bar, I pick the one with the better view of the TV, order a cranberry voka. Most of the guys in there were at least 15 years older than me, but there was a group of 20 something guys playing darts or something (yes, there’s only one pool table). No conversations. I’m just about finished with my drink and a couple guys (the ones playing darts) come up to the bar next to me. One of them drops ass and it REEKS. I left shortly afterwards. I was there for not quite half an hour. Overall, it was a bit lame. The place itself is nice enough, and my cranberry vodka was only 2.50...I asked if that was a special. Nope! So I'll go back, but probably not solo any time soon.
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Post by germaine on Nov 7, 2008 20:19:13 GMT -6
And thank you to Matt for the amusing text messages.
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Post by socal on Nov 7, 2008 22:16:54 GMT -6
I could always give you my little brother's number.
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Post by MoHawk on Nov 10, 2008 11:29:28 GMT -6
And thank you to Matt for the amusing text messages. Anytime. My natural inhibitions were a bit low again on Friday night, did a bonfire at my house. Lots of fun. Fire+Alcohol+Matt=Good Times. |
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Post by germaine on Nov 10, 2008 11:32:10 GMT -6
I could always give you my little brother's number. I would need more information before I can give you an answer. When I hear the phrase "little brother" I think of a 10-year-old pestering the older kids... |
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Post by Iowafan1 on Nov 11, 2008 9:05:44 GMT -6
Germaine....how old are you?....and what is the age bracket you're looking for?
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Post by germaine on Nov 11, 2008 9:42:16 GMT -6
Quickly approaching 29. I've dated 5 years younger to 9 years older...not sure I'd go that young or that old again, but somewhere in between there.
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Post by Iowafan1 on Nov 11, 2008 10:41:29 GMT -6
Oh, you're young! What in the hell are you worried about little girl? You'll have guys begging you in no time!
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Post by germaine on Nov 11, 2008 16:19:34 GMT -6
I'm not really worried, but I do think I should make an effort to be more social overall and meet more people. I tend to become a hermit when left to my own devices.
Plus there is apparently a stigma on women who are 30+ and have never been married...but being 30+ and divorced is okay...I don't know.
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