|
|
Post by ignatiusreilly on Sept 30, 2008 13:02:08 GMT -6
Well since someone here might actually be interested... I wanted to give an update on my situation. I am no longer going to use the 'C' word to describe my friend.. I now know her too well to use a degrading term to describe her. It's not that I'm above using that word now, it's just that for me it no longer applies to her.
Well... I'm probably not doing well in any of your books, but I'm having fun. I've spent a good amount of time with this woman. We have had a lot of fun... I mean many hours of fun. ;-) I'm surprised by her vitality.. and also mine. We've also spent time getting to know each other. I like her. She's also damn sexy for her age... or any age. From what I've seen all warm blooded males of any age gravitate toward her and enjoy her company. A great body (which she definitely has) will do that alone, but she also has a magnetic personality. I'm impressed. She showed me a painting some guy did of her. After meeting her just once this guy went home and painted a picture of her and gave it to her the next time he seen her. I'm not surprised. I also saw a well done portrait she has hanging in her house someone painted of her when she was a young lady... my God.. that's all I can say. If the painting is accurate at all, She was Helen of Troy as a young lady. I just wish she was still that age... because even though I'm not shallow... age matters somewhat. I'm a never been married guy with no kids, it just matters. I'm not the conformist grow up and buy a house in the suburbs and keep up with the Jones's type, but it still matters to me (marriage and kids). Anyways, point is, this lady is a class act. I've grown to like her in the short amount of time I've known her (we've hung out a total of maybe 40 hours awake time). We didn't even hang out last weekend.
Well anyways, my problem is that either I really am a class guy myself... or I just have a grasp on what women like... I like to hope it's a little combination of both. But I think she's falling for me big time. Last night the conversation started really moving this way and I figured I had to tell her my 'line' aka the 'I'm not ready, I just got out of a relationship' angle and I did. She heard it and agreed (it's true). Well she didn't act upset or anything. And I don't think she is. But today she is texting me about how I make her feel and stuff and wants to know how I feel. Well that might freak most guys out, including me, but she's just a very deep person and often talks this way. I guess I'm just thinking she is now kind of wanting me to tell her that I don't want to take this any further.. or I guess the opposite too. But I think she knows what I'm gonna say.
Anyways, sorry about the rambling, but this situation has become very real and I'm in danger of hurting someone and taking a negative hit to my karma. I just figured I'd update you and let you know that I indeed f*cked this thing up, just as many of you predited. Not saying I regret the time I've spent. It has been very good on many perverted and non-perverted levels. This chick is both smart and great in bed (basically the exact combo I am looking for). And I've been watching more NFL football than I have in my life. She freaking loves that stuff and she's not even joking. She remembers the games we've watched better than I do and references them. She'll say something like "Oh remember how well the Chargers played last week when we watched them?" I'm just like, "Oh yeah.. they sure did", but I barely remember watching the Chargers game. It's funny how she has about six favorite teams (not including whatever one Bret Favre is on). She says she doesn't keep all the stats straight like us guys do because she's saving room in her head for other things. But she's a better fan than most people I know. Just purely loves watching the game.
Anyways, sorry for boring you guys. And feel free to call me a p*ssy if you find this post sappy. I deserve it. You guys are probably the crudest (and funniest) people I know and are for sure not the type I should be telling this stuff to, but oh well. I've already shared the story so better keep going... 'In for a penny,in for a pound', as my dad would say.
I'll let you know how it goes from here...
|
|
|
|
Post by bucketochicken on Sept 30, 2008 13:11:54 GMT -6
Actually, it sounds like you done everything BUT fuck it up. Good for you.
Follow your heart. Fuck all the Mancard stuff.
Cheers.
|
|
|
|
Post by MoHawk on Sept 30, 2008 13:20:41 GMT -6
Actually, it sounds like you done everything BUT f**k it up. Good for you. Follow your heart. f**k all the Mancard stuff. Cheers. Second. If you're into her, you're into her. You can't help who you fall in love with. |
|
|
|
Post by Saggitariutt Jefferspin (ith) on Sept 30, 2008 13:28:48 GMT -6
As long as you're communicating and on the same page on expectations, I don't see you doing anything wrong.
|
|
|
|
Post by twinegarden on Sept 30, 2008 13:30:22 GMT -6
Actually, it sounds like you done everything BUT f**k it up. Good for you. Follow your heart. f**k all the Mancard stuff. Cheers. I wonder how long it will be before lets you "buttfuck it up". |
|
|
|
Post by bucketochicken on Sept 30, 2008 13:37:12 GMT -6
"how long will it be"....
Kinda personal, yeah?
|
|
|
|
Post by socal on Sept 30, 2008 13:44:15 GMT -6
I stumbled into my relationship with my now wife --- and tried denying it / running away from fear. Damned glad I didn't succeed in my escape or be overcome with fear. Look at it this way... Disregarding the minor inconveniences (you might have by learning to put the toilet seat down, or shave regularly, etc.) if you can consider yourself even the slightest bit better... embrace it & see that it can simply be a sentence / chapter / or volume of your life. ---Whatever the outcome is, you lived that part of your life to the fullest - and didn't dwell on the "what if's" that can be found in anything/every person. ---That, or she's friggin psycho for wanting anything to do with you in the first place... and you should run far away as fast as you can.  |
|
|
|
Post by germaine on Sept 30, 2008 13:49:02 GMT -6
Aww, our little Iggy Wiggy is falling in lovey wovey. ;-)
You can't control your heart. "Why did I love her? Because she is she and I am I."
I will throw out a word of caution...in some cases, a whirlwind romance works out wonderfully. But (through my experiences and experiences by proxy with crazy women)...the fact that she is already asking how you feel and so on...that does put up a red flag. There's nothing wrong with slowing down, taking a step back (both of you), and building up your relationship the old-fashioned way. In fact, it might be better in the long run because then you get the physical relationship off to the side (already knowing how good it can be) and you can focus on the other stuff.
I'll also say that many women I know (including myself) tend to confuse sex/love an awful lot...often to the detriment of ourselves. The more sex, the more we let our hearts get swept up, and the more pain there is when it's all over. When you say "I'm not ready blah blah blah" but don't hesitate to get her in bed...there are definitely mixed signals (and she's reflecting those mixed signals by saying she understands blah blah blah and then getting into bed). Being completely honest about where you're at and what you're ready for is fantastic...the hard part (for both parties) is following through on that (if you're not ready for a relationship, and women equate sex with a relationship, but you're having sex...you're in a relationship to a certain extent).
|
|
|
|
Post by TBELL on Sept 30, 2008 13:50:22 GMT -6
Who gives a fuck what we all think. It sounds like you dig this girl, so go for it. But if you don't I would say you need to let her know as soon as possible. You sound like a stand up guy, and that would be the right thing to do.
|
|
|
|
Post by ignatiusreilly on Sept 30, 2008 14:51:47 GMT -6
Well thanks guys (and ladies).. I really appreciate your understanding of this thing and your input. And twine.. thanks for the laugh. Someone had to say something crude. I have not gone there yet. ;-)
I texted her that 'i don't want a relationship right now thing' just now (I worded it better) and her reply was to take it one day at a time and she asked if I still wanted to see her again. I told her yes, so I think she'll back off a little on the relationship thing. Not that she was pushing it. It'll be interesting to see what happens.
My other problem is that I'm very newly single. I was with the same woman for almost 6 years. I'm enjoying being single for the most part, I've had some fun these past few months... her being a good example. Last weekend I didn't hang out with her at all, I spent it with some friends... we went out and had fun and met people. My heart is telling me you're having fun with this chick and she's interesting, but you got to get out there, brother. There's going to be a clash. I think I'm just going to try and avoid it, but whatever happens will happen. I feel better now that I told her I'm not ready for a relationship. It will lessen whatever blow might come in the future. Then again it might also open the door for her to sleep around to spite me. I don't know too much about that aspect of her life before she met me... she says she was kind of lonely, but this girl knows how to have a good time.
Anyways, as you can see I'm no saint. And I don't think I'm falling in lovey wovey (or however you put it Germaine). I think she's a great person and I admire the way she looks at life... in other words I like a lot of things about her, but I don't think I'm falling in love.
I'll let you know what happens... you know the plane will eventually crash into the mountain... so stay tuned. ;-)
|
|
|
|
Post by 101 on Sept 30, 2008 14:56:23 GMT -6
Just take it one day at a time, be honest about where your at in your head and let the chips fall where they may. If it all turns out good (whatever that may entail), great. If the relationship falls apart over that point, so be it.
You gotta be true to yourself before you can be of any value to anyone else.
|
|
|
|
Post by NotMyKid on Sept 30, 2008 15:29:48 GMT -6
How did her panties fit? ;D Sorry, I couldn't resist! I will throw out a word of caution...in some cases, a whirlwind romance works out wonderfully. But (through my experiences and experiences by proxy with crazy women)...the fact that she is already asking how you feel and so on...that does put up a red flag. Listen to Germaine, she knows what she's talking about. Be very careful. A women that is already asking about feelings after that short of time together is bad news. You don't have to cut ties if you enjoy spending time with her but take a step back, a LARGE step back, enjoy being single and hanging out with your friends, meeting new people and just having a good time. Sure she can be a part of that just slow down. |
|
|
|
Post by ignatiusreilly on Sept 30, 2008 15:35:57 GMT -6
Good advice Hoffa. I was really worried about what you'd say. lol. They fit her pretty well :-D
|
|
|
|
Post by mattahawk on Sept 30, 2008 21:46:56 GMT -6
Aww, our little Iggy Wiggy is falling in lovey wovey. ;-) You can't control your heart. "Why did I love her? Because she is she and I am I." I will throw out a word of caution...in some cases, a whirlwind romance works out wonderfully. But (through my experiences and experiences by proxy with crazy women)...the fact that she is already asking how you feel and so on...that does put up a red flag. There's nothing wrong with slowing down, taking a step back (both of you), and building up your relationship the old-fashioned way. In fact, it might be better in the long run because then you get the physical relationship off to the side (already knowing how good it can be) and you can focus on the other stuff. I'll also say that many women I know (including myself) tend to confuse sex/love an awful lot...often to the detriment of ourselves. The more sex, the more we let our hearts get swept up, and the more pain there is when it's all over. When you say "I'm not ready blah blah blah" but don't hesitate to get her in bed...there are definitely mixed signals (and she's reflecting those mixed signals by saying she understands blah blah blah and then getting into bed). Being completely honest about where you're at and what you're ready for is fantastic...the hard part (for both parties) is following through on that (if you're not ready for a relationship, and women equate sex with a relationship, but you're having sex...you're in a relationship to a certain extent). Hey we have our very own Ann Landers on board, cool. Very good post Germaine. From my own experiences with women I would say 100% true. My wife works with a guy in his late 50's and he has a daughter in her mid 30's. She just married a guy a couple of weeks ago that is in his mid 60's!!! The dad aint to happy to have a son-in-law older than he is. But what can you say? She fell in love, shit happens. If you do, you do. You could always adopt if you want kids. My wife and I talked out EVERYTHING to make sure that there was no misunderstanding after we were married. Neither of us wanted to be in a relationship if we wanted different things. I'm talking about deciding about which church to go to, how many kids we wanted, where we were going to live, etc. In fact, you could talk to her about it, that you would be interested in adopting if it works out between you two. If she gets scared and runs then it wasn't meant to be, if she says that's great who knows? If it don't work out but you stay "together" then I have 3 words for you buddy. Friends with benefits. |
|
|
|
Post by socal on Sept 30, 2008 22:01:36 GMT -6
You could always adopt if you want kids. My wife and I talked out EVERYTHING to make sure that there was no misunderstanding after we were married. Neither of us wanted to be in a relationship if we wanted different things. I'm talking about deciding about which church to go to, how many kids we wanted, where we were going to live, etc. In fact, you could talk to her about it, that you would be interested in adopting if it works out between you two. If she gets scared and runs then it wasn't meant to be, if she says that's great who knows? Not that this is anywhere near near reality... but in my tired mind, I envisioned the Matta/future Mrs. Matta conversation going a bit like this: FMM: You know matta, I've been thinking a lot about our future. M: Yeah, me too. FMM: I'm looking forward to living in Mattaville with my husband & Matta jr. & FMM junior... M: Yeah, me too. FMM: We can decorate Matta jr's room with an elfin fantasy motif, and have unicorns and fairies on the walls - with a troll guarding his door. And little FMM junior's room we will decorate with hearts and fuzzy caterpillars... M: Yeah, cool. (OR... M: I always dreamt of my son's room having unicorns and fairies...) FMM: Wouldn't that be wonderful? M: Yeah... so, can we have sex now? |
|
|
|
Post by scotthawk on Oct 1, 2008 7:04:17 GMT -6
Is this the Kindergarten teacher or do I have my characters mixed up?
|
|
|
|
Post by germaine on Oct 1, 2008 7:13:00 GMT -6
Is this the Kindergarten teacher or do I have my characters mixed up? This is the cougar. Matty B. Soulchild has the kindergarten teacher. |
|
|
|
Post by scotthawk on Oct 1, 2008 7:30:36 GMT -6
ahh yes, thanks. I've been hit and miss on the board lately and got mixed up.
|
|
|
|
Post by isu is shit on Oct 1, 2008 8:04:14 GMT -6
You don't have to cut ties if you enjoy spending time with her but take a step back, a LARGE step back, enjoy being single and hanging out with your friends, meeting new people and just having a good time. Sure she can be a part of that just slow down. [/quote]
Perfect!!!
|
|
|
|
Post by isu is shit on Oct 1, 2008 8:04:55 GMT -6
oh yeah, and she's still a cougar |
|
|
|
Post by mattahawk on Oct 1, 2008 12:58:15 GMT -6
You could always adopt if you want kids. My wife and I talked out EVERYTHING to make sure that there was no misunderstanding after we were married. Neither of us wanted to be in a relationship if we wanted different things. I'm talking about deciding about which church to go to, how many kids we wanted, where we were going to live, etc. In fact, you could talk to her about it, that you would be interested in adopting if it works out between you two. If she gets scared and runs then it wasn't meant to be, if she says that's great who knows? Not that this is anywhere near near reality... but in my tired mind, I envisioned the Matta/future Mrs. Matta conversation going a bit like this: FMM: You know matta, I've been thinking a lot about our future. M: Yeah, me too. FMM: I'm looking forward to living in Mattaville with my husband & Matta jr. & FMM junior... M: Yeah, me too. FMM: We can decorate Matta jr's room with an elfin fantasy motif, and have unicorns and fairies on the walls - with a troll guarding his door. And little FMM junior's room we will decorate with hearts and fuzzy caterpillars... M: Yeah, cool. (OR... M: I always dreamt of my son's room having unicorns and fairies...) FMM: Wouldn't that be wonderful? M: Yeah... so, can we have sex now? As far as your tired mind? I'm thinking if you have conversaitons like that with yourself often maybe the "little,BIG socal" ought to have "BIG BIG socal" checked into a hospital for an psychiatric evaluation. Just a thought. Now your talking about fairies and what not? Makes me think you are living the lie with the "wife" as you call her. On here anyways. I'm just guessing here but i'm thinking your life is this close to being the feature act on the Jerry Springer show. |
|
|
|
Post by socal on Oct 1, 2008 13:28:15 GMT -6
Not that this is anywhere near near reality... but in my tired mind, I envisioned the Matta/future Mrs. Matta conversation going a bit like this: FMM: You know matta, I've been thinking a lot about our future. M: Yeah, me too. FMM: I'm looking forward to living in Mattaville with my husband & Matta jr. & FMM junior... M: Yeah, me too. FMM: We can decorate Matta jr's room with an elfin fantasy motif, and have unicorns and fairies on the walls - with a troll guarding his door. And little FMM junior's room we will decorate with hearts and fuzzy caterpillars... M: Yeah, cool. (OR... M: I always dreamt of my son's room having unicorns and fairies...) FMM: Wouldn't that be wonderful? M: Yeah... so, can we have sex now? As far as your tired mind? I'm thinking if you have conversaitons like that with yourself often maybe the "little,BIG socal" ought to have "BIG BIG socal" checked into a hospital for an psychiatric evaluation. Just a thought. Now your talking about fairies and what not? Makes me think you are living the lie with the "wife" as you call her. On here anyways. I'm just guessing here but i'm thinking your life is this close to being the feature act on the Jerry Springer show. Cool, I must have been right on with my thoughts --- as you didn't spend one word denying them. |
|
|
|
Post by mattahawk on Oct 1, 2008 18:38:36 GMT -6
As far as your tired mind? I'm thinking if you have conversaitons like that with yourself often maybe the "little,BIG socal" ought to have "BIG BIG socal" checked into a hospital for an psychiatric evaluation. Just a thought. Now your talking about fairies and what not? Makes me think you are living the lie with the "wife" as you call her. On here anyways. I'm just guessing here but i'm thinking your life is this close to being the feature act on the Jerry Springer show. Cool, I must have been right on with my thoughts --- as you didn't spend one word denying them. SHIT!!! I've just been busted by the King Kong size version of Columbo.  What's a guy to do? |
|
herkyp
Prostate Massager
Posts: 134
|
Post by herkyp on Dec 12, 2008 14:39:51 GMT -6
Was bored here at work and going thru some old threads. Thought I'd bump this for an update.
|
|
|
|
Post by NotMyKid on Dec 12, 2008 16:36:06 GMT -6
Was bored here at work and going thru some old threads. Thought I'd bump this for an update. Well done! Great-  |
|
