|
|
Post by Gumbyhawk on Apr 11, 2008 14:11:18 GMT -6
Man, this is a tough one for me. When I consider Jan Miller and some of my former bosses, it gets even tougher to pick out a winner.
I think I may have to go with this one tool who worked at one of my former haunts. To sum up his "toolishness", this asshat once ran for city council claiming that he supervised a 6MM addition being added onto our company building. Number one, who the frick cares? And number two... his job description was essentially "head janitor" at this old company. His leadership skills maxed out at having some poor slob throw on some boots and unplug the shitter every so often.
Needless to say, this guy didn't win his Council bid and for all I know... is still badgering employees over parking two inches over the line in the parking lot (something that he ALSO did constantly).
What says the board? Anyone got any good "tool stories"??
|
|
|
|
Post by The Flying Spaghetti Monster on Apr 11, 2008 14:14:53 GMT -6
What did that make you?
Senior Assistant to the Head Janitor in charge of unplugging shitters?
|
|
|
|
Post by NOTTHOR on Apr 11, 2008 14:18:09 GMT -6
Just about half the class coming in to my Firm as summer associates each year. Just when I think it can get no toolier, it always does. There have been so many and all are so close to being equal it is hard to pick out a clear winner.
|
|
|
|
Post by Gumbyhawk on Apr 11, 2008 14:22:10 GMT -6
What did that make you? Senior Assistant to the Head Janitor in charge of unplugging shitters? Nope. My job (although not officially) was to clog said shitters. A job that I did well, I may add. |
|
|
|
Post by bucketochicken on Apr 11, 2008 14:22:19 GMT -6
...Just when I think it can get no toolier, it always does. There have been so many and all are so close to being equal it is hard to pick out a clear winner. Cosign. |
|
|
|
Post by Gumbyhawk on Apr 11, 2008 14:27:23 GMT -6
Oh... I almost forgot to add THIS classic from the same tool!! During the time of the company remodeling/addition, this tool actually took his square of carpeting and cut out his initials & inserted different colored carpeting. Basically made a nice stencil of his initials in his cubicle carpet. He got away with it bince the company was gonna replace the entire carpeting within 4-5 months, but still.... what an unbelievable friggin' TOOL!!!  |
|
|
|
Post by Mr Olympia on Apr 11, 2008 14:40:30 GMT -6
this kid I knew in high school. He would only act tough if his "bodyguard" was around. He would always talk shit to me when he was around but the second that big sasquatch went away he would stop talking shit. Talk about a tool box
|
|
|
|
Post by MoHawk on Apr 11, 2008 15:02:52 GMT -6
My former owner/GM at KGRN in Grinnell. I've long s-ince let go of all the animosity I held towards the man, and don't feel the need to air any old stories I've got. Suffice it to say he defines tool.
|
|
|
|
Post by Gumbyhawk on Apr 11, 2008 15:05:32 GMT -6
My former owner/GM at KGRN in Grinnell. I've long s-ince let go of all the animosity I held towards the man, and don't feel the need to air any old stories I've got. Suffice it to say he defines tool. Moreso than the tool I described? |
|
|
|
Post by MoHawk on Apr 11, 2008 15:12:43 GMT -6
My guy puts your guy to shame gumby. That I promise you. I know that I'll have no problems working for any other boss the rest of my life because I've already worked for the worst.
|
|
|
|
Post by Gumbyhawk on Apr 11, 2008 15:22:43 GMT -6
Wow, Mohawk!!
We might have a winner then!
|
|
|
|
Post by mattahawk on Apr 13, 2008 18:17:51 GMT -6
Actually that is incorrect. You have yet to meet mine. He is THAT bad.
|
|
|
|
Post by ignatiusreilly on Apr 14, 2008 8:35:35 GMT -6
probably this guy:  |
|
|
|
Post by detlef on Apr 14, 2008 9:18:01 GMT -6
Jeff Christensen. LOCK.
|
|
|
|
Post by Gumbyhawk on Apr 16, 2008 11:34:50 GMT -6
Edit:
sparticusmaximus
|
|
|
|
Post by guyruckerfarted on Apr 16, 2008 11:40:57 GMT -6
Mary Sue Coleman, that bitch had the audacity to sign her name to a mass email calling for UI students to donate to "Dollars for the Dome" when the capitol caught on fire. What a pompous ass move by the administration. Following a recent tuition rate increase, they asked poor college kids to pay for what is insured as a historical state landmark. Sorry UI if your premiums went up following the fire, call Chris Kingsbury, I'm sure he can underwrite a reasonable policy.
|
|
|
|
Post by NOTTHOR on Apr 16, 2008 11:45:03 GMT -6
Dude - Kingsbury is a banker, not an insurance guy. If they need INsurance, Mack MacCausland is the guy to call. Fixed annuities, variable annuities, whole life (term life is for suckers), variable life, renters, homeowners, domeowners. That name again is Mack MacCausland. Anyone with over a million dollars insured with Mack gets a Kent MacCasuland autographed 4x6.
|
|
|
|
Post by Gumbyhawk on Apr 16, 2008 11:48:33 GMT -6
Dude - Kingsbury is a banker, not an insurance guy. If they need INsurance, Mack MacCausland is the guy to call. Fixed annuities, variable annuities, whole life (term life is for suckers), variable life, renters, homeowners, domeowners. That name again is Mack MacCausland. Anyone with over a million dollars insured with Mack gets a Kent MacCasuland autographed 4x6. Kevin Boyle. Reinbeck, Iowa. Drop my name when you look him up so I can get a cut. ;D |
|
|
|
Post by NOTTHOR on Apr 16, 2008 12:05:36 GMT -6
Crazy story re Reinbeck. I used to work for a dry cleaners in Neck Moines. One day I rolled into work a little under the influence. Boss had a semi-slow brother who collected old Chryslers. He had a lead on one for sale up in Cedar Falls. He worked out a deal to trade two cars for this 76 New Yorker Brougham I think. However, he needed someone to follow him up there driving the second car.
Boss gets in my grill and wonders "what I'd been doing" before work. Asks if I'd like to head up to CF. I say yes to get the hell out of there.
Anywho, we get there and it was uneventful. On the way back, while we were in the one car, we heard a grinding noise and all of the sudden the battery light came on. The fucking alternator belt snapped outside of Reinbeck and it was about 10 or 11 o'clock at night. This was before cell phones. My fucking level of rage went through the roof. Thank god we stopped at a farm house and the wife (prolly went by Ma) drove us into Reinbeck and we got the last room at the motel. I told the retard he had to sleep on the floor. Man, he was pissed about that, as he thought I should sleep on the floor bince I worked for his brother. The fucking guy didn't have a credit card and only had like $30 cash on him. He has no idea how close to death he came.
I rolled into work the next night and the boss said "How was the trip?" He said I should have clocked out before I went and that he wasn't going to pay for the time on the trip. I told the guy to go fuck himself and got another job two days later. Thank god for the kind people of Reinbeck, but man that town brings back bad memories.
|
|
|
|
Post by spartacusmaximus on Apr 16, 2008 12:26:33 GMT -6
Biggest tool ever...easy, it's a tie between Hayden Fry and Kirk Ferentz. Or maybe anybody ever who lived in Iowa. But on the plus side, Steve Alford is one of the smartest, best-dressed coaches to ever walk the sidelines.
|
|
|
|
Post by bucketochicken on Apr 16, 2008 12:50:53 GMT -6
Zing!
|
|
|
|
Post by Gumbyhawk on Apr 16, 2008 14:42:27 GMT -6
Edit once again....
sparticusmaximus' Dad for not pulling out and dribbling him down Ma's thigh.
|
|
